my favourite kind of friendship is one where there’s a mutual understanding of the fact that we both have our own lives so we won’t be able to talk or hang out all the time but when we do talk or hang out it’s like picking up right where we left off
I’ve been looking at all my pictures I’ve been tagged in Facebook and I look so happy but I’m not. I have done so many wonderful things but haven’t been able to enjoy them. I’ve been offered many opportunities, but most of them I decided to not do… all because I let my insecurities get to me. In every picture I can recall why I was upset and what I was struggling with. And a lot of it was stupid things. All my life I’ve struggled with accepting who I was and caring too much and hating how I looked and who I was and how people thought of me. I was such a great person with so many goals and inspirations but I let my insecurities get the best of me. And my largest one was my appearance and body. I hated myself in that way. And it made me such a sad person and held me back from a lot - childhood, happiness, self love, friends, sports… I’m looking at my pictures and I can actually see I was a very good looking girl. Not to be like arrogant. But at the time I thought I was the ugliest piece of shit ever, worth nothing that was never good enough and never would be. I can’t believe I’ve lived so many years unhappy when I had so much potential to do so many great things. It’s really sad. All that time, just totally wasted.